everthing is never enough

Is there more to life?

second thoughts

or maybe I was just too engrossed into my thoughts and was thinking too much.

Slap my face,
and I'm falling straight right
back to reality...


p.s: just can't wait for exams to be over. Currently in a dilemma on whether to celebrate Halloween. nothing to wear.. nothing to wear... was thinking to wearing my leopard print bra but got no tight leather pants. damn...no time to buy.. ish. Don't go la

a conflicted heart

Wake me up...
Call me crazy...
Call me insane...
Call me stupid...
Say that I'm outta my mind...
Tell me I'm unreasonable, please...

It's not that I believe in fairy tales.
It's not that I believe in happy ever after.
It's not that I wanna hurt myself too.

just because I think we could be forever...
but not together for now.

p.s (thoughts behind my head ): lemme play along... I promise I won't get hurt. heh

oh my exams...

I had my exam in a food court
but is seem pretty high class though because it's in the Caulfield Racecourse.

It's weird because they were using cloth to hang up the clocks in front which does not face straight because of the cloth twirling around

I've never seen so many people taking an exam at the same time.
We practically took up the whole row of buildings.


I haven't sat for an exam for almost a year. I sat down calming myself down during the reading time. My heart was beating so fast. Seriously, its good that they created such things. If not, I'll always be freaking out. My heartbeat came steadier as I began to write.

It felt good though, after the 10 minutes of just flicking through the paper. I seem to enjoy exams because you're in control for that 2-3 hours to determine your results. Plus, everything will just flow out. Everything that you have read and all. Just vomit all out because I don't wish to go over it again. However, the studying process is horrible.

horny bastards

This is the 2nd time some random dude add me in msn asking for sex since I came here.
I have no idea how did they get access to my contact...

loving your pear-shaped body

I think this is something only girls can appreciate...
especially when you meet these criteria s.
(Just meet most of them the you can carry on reading)

Pear shapes usually have:

• A bottom heavy shape
• Thin and slender neck
• Narrow or sloping shoulders
• Larger and more generous lower hips and thighs

You definitely have a curvy bottom half, with rounded hips and full thighs.
For me, I have all of it except the 3rd one. I have nice shoulders. heh

Don't get confuse yourself between an apple and a pear OK. Even if you have huge boobs, it does not make you an apple. Just look at the picture then you should be able to figure it out.


"The pear shape is the most common shape in women, as the hips are unfortunately the place where excess weight usually goes first, however, this is not unattractive as it highlights the differences between men and women (which is key to sexual attraction)"

After all your episodes of "I hate that my butt is so big", here are some sexy celebrities who do have the same body shape as you.

Don't believe? Why do you think she's so flat? Check out her thighs & hips when she's wearing her bikini. I doubt if she were to be a tube/ ruler shaped she would such big thighs. (for her size of course)



Other famous people:
- Jennifer Lopez
- Rihanna
- Paris Hilton
- Heidi Klum

"A common misconception is that Pear Shaped people are overweight. This is simply untrue! Many people who are skinny are Pear Shaped, like Keira Knightly for example. Very thin girl, but every extra ounce goes right to the upper thigh.

Pear Shaped is similar to Hourglass Shaped, but people with an Hourglass figure have wider hips than upper thigh. Once your thigh measurement is more than hip measurement, you have gone over to the Pear Shaped side of the figure map.

Another misconception is that you have to have very narrow shoulders and small breasts to be Pear Shaped. This is also untrue. The most important thing to classify one as Pear Shaped, is to have wider thighs than hips."

Here are some dresses that you can look out for that will suit your body.

Then again, please watch you weight or you'll end up like this..


Yes.. yes.. the all "famous" Britney Spears.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Hit the gym, it'll be good for you.
Look at how hot Britney can get.. yum yumm.

who could have imagined?

The following quote was printed in the book The Clitoral Truth by Rebecca Chalker; it originally appeared in a letter in the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology 175, Sept 1996 page 753.

"We recently observed a female fetus at 32 weeks' gestation touching the vulva with fingers of [her] right hand. The caressing movement was centered primarily on the region of the clitoris. Movements stopped after 30 to 40 seconds, and started again after a few moments. Further, these light touches were repeated and were associated with short, rigid movements of the pelvis and legs. After another break, in addition to this behavior, the fetus contracted the muscles of the trunk and limbs, and the climax, clonicotonic movements [rapid muscle contractions] of the body, followed. Finally she relaxed and rested. We [several doctors and the mother] observed this behavior for about 20 minutes."

This raises the possibility that infant girls, as well as boys, may have some sexual awareness at birth. They may already know what sexual pleasure is and how to obtain it. Is it possible that fetal thumb sucking and masturbation are equally necessary and beneficial to the developing fetus? When an infant girl touches her vulva is she just then becoming aware of it or is she demonstrating what she learned or knew prior to birth? What are the psychological consequences of pushing her hand away? Would we do the same if she were sucking on her thumb? This one obscure record of fetal sexuality challenges our perceptions of human sexuality, if it does not in fact destroy them.

p.s: Honestly, I totally freaked out after reading this...

the never ending chase

People always want things that they can't reach
but once they have it, they wont appreciate it.

In the attempt to get it, they go all out, having to find all means and ways to have/catch it.
but why do they get bored when they finally have it?
Shouldn't they appreciate it more?
Maybe it's just human nature,
to not want to feel obligated to it
by feeling that all freedom is lost.


Is it just the challenge of getting it that makes it exciting?
Or is it just greed?

Once they get so familiar with it, they'll slowly let loose and
when it finally runs away,
they'll wanna chase it all over again...

when the truth unfolds

I'm so sorry for causing so much trouble by adjusting my blog as a private one.

I know you have to take the trouble to access to your Google account and all.
but I'm just doing this because I don't one some random people to be offended or hurt because of the things I say.

If you really wanna know, just ask me personally because I'm still NOT trusting the permission mode for blogger yet.

Thanks to those who are willing to still drop by ones in a while but it doesn't matter if you don't want to.

in a sexist society

Why do people still have such stereotypical thinking and mindsets?


Just last night I overheard a conversation between D and S which was in Malay.
S was mentioning that men really respect girls who are still virgins especially those who are able to keep 'it' until they get married.
She was also saying how guys treat virgins better compared to non-virgins.















What do you think?
What if it was a guy instead?
I'm guessing most of you will be thinking it doesn't matter for guys, right? (The more he sleeps around, the more experienced he is in pleasing you?)

Hang on a minute, what about girls?
As a girl, wouldn't you want to be knowledgeable and skillful to please your partner too?
Why do you think some husbands cheat on their wives for hotter or younger girls (maybe more skillful ones)?

Why can't people think equally for both the male and female species?
Why should the female species be created when they can't have equal rights compared to males???


Anyway,

So what if you (boy/girl) keep your virginity until get married?
Like I said, it doesn't mean the marriage is gonna last. There's always such things as divorce, affairs and what is your partner turns gay?
Even when your dating and you're so sure he/she's the one? When things go wrong, there it goes.

Well,
Some people believe that you should test the water first before jumping in it.
I'm not suggesting that you test every puddle or mud, OK.
but..
and what if you got raped instead? Gang-banged?
So I'm guessing, if it was a girl, she'll be considered to be 'stained and dirty' forever?
and if it was a boy, it'll be like heaven for him, right?


Would you want to marry somebody who is still a virgin but unable to fulfill your sexual needs?
During your honeymoon, I'm sure you wouldn't want to find out that your partner is just unable to have sex?
or is just sexual handicapped.




You know what, talking about equal right for both sex reminds me of Sex and the City. I wish they produced more seasons and did not have to end.
Here are some hilarious quotes from them:






"When men attempt bold gestures, generally it's considered romantic. When women do it, it's often considered desperate or psycho."


"Are we simply romantically challenged, or are we sluts?"


"Men cheat for the same reason that dogs lick their balls... because they can."


"I will wear whatever and blow whomever I want long as I can breathe and kneel."


"A guy can just easily dump you if you fuck him on the first date as he can if you wait until the tenth."


"Balls are to men what purses are to women."

smelling good

and so I went to the City to settle my bank card and stumbled upon this huge sign on this shop that says

15% off all selected perfumes.
plus they had such a big collection
and the sale is only for 5 days.

Oh my god, I couldn't resist, heh.

and so,



















pretty eh?


Seriously there so many others but I hate STRONG floral, sweet and fruity smells.
(kinda sounds as though I hate all smells)
yea, so there wasn't much choice for me. Everything the sales women recommended, I thoroughly pushed away but this particular one that I chose was really MILD, sweetish floral.
(seems like I'm contradicting what I like but seriously, its mild and really nice)

It reminds me of a nice sunny day in spring where you can wear your pretty dress and dance around with the wind blowing through your hair... :)

for all the wrong reasons

Guys want love for sex
.
.
.
but

Girls want sex for love


so I'm guessing.. everybody gets hurt and fucked up

when technology gets frustrating

This is the second time around that I've been having problems with my online banking.
I always have the habit of not writing down passwords to access important stuff because I somehow I have this mindset that it is just not safe as people might find it and access to your stuff and when it does happen, its all too late and your broke. Doomed forever by parents...
The thing is, I keep forgetting password...
and I thought banks have taken so much effort to increase their technology by having online and telephone banking so that we as customers, don't have to take the effort to line-up in long ques to do the old fashion way of face-to-face.


This sucks.
My exams start next week and now I have to go all the way to the city to unlock the damn thing.
What makes it more frustrating is that I'm left with only a dollar or two in my wallet and a standard train tickets (which are concessions, whom I am not even eligible for) are about 2-3 dollars.
Plus I'm owing money to my other housemates for bills and stuff.

I felt like such a bimbo when I called customer service again because they had a record of me calling the last time because I forgot my password AGAIN.
They even asked me whether was I a student.
This is discrimination mann... stereotyping the perception that students are foolish and dumb.

time is of the essence

My really worried about exams
but I wonder why, deep down inside...

I'm wishing time would fly faster.

I look at the clock more often than my books.
It's so hard to concerntrate...
If only time did not exist,

How would that change things?


Su Jen... go study..!!!


why do all love songs make me think of you?
This sucks big time... I mean it
especially when most songs are about feelings for another, whether good or bad

a breath of fresh air

Like I said... its spring now..
but its winter in my heart.

and just because I kissed a frog who turned into a handsome prince.

but it takes two hands to clap
by having distance as a bridge in between, I'm clapping alone again.

As cliche as it sounds,
Its better to have love and lost than to have never love at all.

I'm fine, really...
Just tired, tired of it all...

girls & shopping

Why do girls love shopping so much?
.
.
.
because shopping makes girls feel beautiful
she'll realize that she doesn't have to have the 36-24-36 body to look fabulous




shopping makes girls feel like a princess
sales people are assisting her all the time and are so friendly and nice



shopping is like an aphrodisiac to a girl
trying sexy clothes makes her feel sexy. with the mirror in the changing room, she can do all her crazy, promiscuous posers.



shopping is like body art
then she'll realize shopping is about chasing fashion, being creative and putting a pieces together making it something exquisite.



shopping gives a boost to girls' confidence
it's alright to be fat, thin, tall or short because there are clothes that fit perfectly for everybody




shopping makes girls forget about all their problems and sorrow
when she's too intensely into searching for something or being amazed by all the wonderful things, she'll forget about what's hurting or troubling her the most.

shopping makes girls feel in control
I dunno how explain this. but it really does... haha

and even if she doesn't buy anything but tries all those pretty clothes, accessories, lingerie, cosmetics, SHOES .. etc. etc..

Ultimately, it makes girls feel HAPPY



p.s: so guys, if you wanna make your girl love you, you know what to do...
Bring them shopping!
take the effort comment on their dressing (good & honest comments of course)
.
and carry their shopping bags.. hee
Oh yea, and STOP complaining that we shop too much. If you want us to look good (so that you can show us off to your mates too) then let us shop to our heart's desire. hah

4 seasons love

because Love is like four seasons too.

In spring, when flowers bloom and days are sunny, everything is fresh, lovely and nice.
Excitement comes when winds blow strongly.
Familiarizing with the bright skies puts a smile to everyone's face.
Every girl is dressed up in pretty dresses and bonnets, running around feeling so loved.




Summer comes when it gets hot and tense.
Things get serious and anxiety tightens.
Fun is the most while playing on the beach, sharing ice creams and cooling off in pools but
frustrations builds up when its burning up .



Autumn flows in when it cools down.
Everything seems more familiar and gloomy...
The only comfort is a simply warm hug.
The flowers and leaves slowly turn into dull colours.



When winter comes, everything gets too cold..
It dies off... in the chilly nights and when it gets dark,
you're all alone again...

angry with the world

I don't see the point in feeling this way. It'll only hurt your soul and it won't change a thing.

but

I feel so ANGRY now. So frustrated and pissed off. I can feel the anguish burning up deep inside of me. Please get me outta this misery. It's killing me...
Is it me? or is it the everybody else?
You know, when some point in your life where all you want is to burst out and scream out lungs out into the sky or maybe in the toilet bowl.
Yea, here's that moment I'm having. Take it away... take it away. Turn it into dust and blow it far away from me.

For now, I'm going to sleep it off, in hoping tomorrow will be a bright sunny day and everything will be fine.

the unhappy sunny weekend

Why are weekends always sunny and weekdays gloomy?

Why do I feel like I need some excitement in my life
when exams are so soon.
I wish everybody here would not be such a distraction...

(Why are my housemates still going to house parties and the beach?
Aren't they worried about exams?)

I feel tired of sitting here waiting for magic to happen
when I know I can't do anything about it.

I need to do well..
(if I wanna switch to a double degree)
I screw up my management assignment AGAIN!
I SERIOUSLY think my tutor hates me because
I followed exactly what had to be done in the examples

My law assignment went into the wrong tutors hands too.
She gave us bad marks when my tutor would have given us a D for it.
Plus my partner kept complaining to my tutor.
I'm so worried that she'll make BOTH of us on his bad side
and it'll probably show on my final paper if HE marks it.
She wished my partner would have just kept her mouth shut.

Why am I so unlucky??
It's not that I'm stupid.. but because of all this
Now I have to really work my butt off... DAMN IT.

hibernating

I won't be blogging too much from now onwards because exam's in the next 2 WEEKS..!!!
All the best to everybody else who are having exams soon too..
screw those who dont..


xoxo

hungry hungry hungry

Past two days has been killing me.

The weather has suddenly turned cold again because of the rain.

It makes me feel so HUNGRY...!!!

OoH please stop me from eating... PLEASE...

Is there a way...???!!!

I was so hungry when I went to Coles today to get some groceries, I end up getting a lotta junk to please my taste buds.. Everything looked so nice and smelled HEAVENLY...
I'm so gonna be a big FAT PIG...

FAT PIG

FAT PIG

FAT PIG...!!!

pretty pink fat pig? Ok... That's not possible..

I need self control.. :(

p.s:
My college friends and I are already planing for our big end of the year gathering.. I'm so excited about it too...
It's been almost a year since I saw all of them. Miss them so much.
Although college was only a year, we still managed to hang around in such a big group. 16 of us, all together.

zouk out

To my dear high school friends,

Interested in going to the Zouk Out at Siloso Beach on the 13th of December??!!
Last year, Armin, Booka Shade, DJ Steve Aoki and tons more were there. I hope it'll be better this year.

It'll be fun. We'll be walking around with our bikini's and going crazy.

For more info,
http://www.zoukout.com/

There're are videos and pictures in the website.

p.s: so excited for exams to end...!

F-I-N-E

My headache went away after my nap, I think.

It would have been better without the 'interruption'.

I wish I went out last night. I'm sure my cousin and friends were pissed drunk.

Holidays are going to be over soon... :(

blowing up head

I still feel awful.

I was suppose to meet my cousin in seven last night but I couldn't even bring myself to take a shower.

I don't think its fever but I I'm just having such a bad headache.

My eyes are red but I definitely had enough sleep.

I feel so weak but I've been eating a lot.

I can feel my carotid pulse beating so hard, I think its gonna burst.

What's wrong with me?

I feel bored and sad but I have so much work to do.

Please kill me...



S just came back from seeing her dad so the house's noisy again
but all I feel is to jump outta the balcony like what they always joke about..

I hope I'll fall on the fence and die...

.
.
.
.
.
.
I read a Malaysian news today.
A girl got abducted and beaten up in BBU.
Brought all the way to Kempas and was gang raped.

She was unconscious the whole time until she woke up at 4am finding blood at her private parts.

Only 2 SUSPECTS were caught.

.

I hope the rest burn and die in hell.

losing an hour?!

Daylight saving starts this Sunday at 2am...!

Being such a bimbo, I have no idea why do we need to tune time an hour later.
I guess I shall check on that.

It ends on the 5th of April next year.

p.s: ok, don't start explaining it to me on my tagboard because I'll definitely look it up on wikipedia or something.. :P

shopped till I almost drop

I went to Chapel Street today. I was suppose to go yesterday because the weather was fabulous but I woke up with a heat rush. It gave me a bad headache. It's the stupid heater, I think.

As soon as I stepped out today, I knew it was going to rain soon as it was so cloudy plus windy. When I reached there it started to drizzle but luckily the shops were all along the road so I just had to keep going in them to keep myself dry. hee.. good excuse.

As I went straight after my lunch, I felt so undigested because of the walking and my vest was making it worse because it was so tight. I think I put on weight..!! sobs..
I bought I couple of pretty dresses from Bardot and Supre and a pair of Novo's by Gisele Bundchen. They're like 10 times more comfortable then my stupid Vincci that I had last year. There were a lot of other designs but I still think this one fits my feet best. They did not have as much variety in the shop.
You can always check out the others in the Novo page.
http://www.novoshoes.com.au/



Seriously, the rain made I feel so terrible. I was so scared that I would faint in the middle of the streets.

love letter

Be calm;

for only by calmly considering our lives can we achieve our purpose to live together- -
Be calm--love me--Today--yesterday--what tearful longing for you--for you--you--my life--my all--all good wishes to you--Oh, do continue to love me--never misjudge your lover's most faithful heart.

ever yours

ever mine

ever ours...

reaching home

i miss home..

yes... I FINALLY said it.

I miss the weather...

I miss the food... (so sick of cooking)

I miss my friends... (in high school & college)

I miss my room...

I miss my parents...

I miss my dear...

I miss HOME...!!!

It's official.!

Going back on the 14th of November.

Taking a 17:05 Qantas flight from Melbourne to Singapore at 21:30.
(I know Qantas is crappy and is still having lotsa service problems but it was the cheapest flight under my Uni's agent so don't blame me if my flight is delayed or if I landed in the wrong place like the sea or some mountain or not land at all)